Day 30 Till I Die

 

Hello Love,

Do you know, today is the last day of April? Tomorrow, we'll start a new day in a new month. So, four months of 2025 have passed. And me? I'm still here.  I don't know what to do. Haha!

I released my last album today.  I made these three albums while I was heartbroken before.  They contain everything I was feeling and thinking.  If people listen to them, maybe they'll know everything about me.

The first album is "Hugging My Trauma," and it has six songs. The overall story is about my feelings when my relationship was almost broken. How I still wanted to fix it, but also felt hopeless.  How I blamed myself for everything that happened. How stupid I felt for letting him hurt me. Things like that.

The second album is "The Sweetest Revenge," and it has four songs.  The overall story is about my anger. My anger about everything: him, his friends, and his family.  How they seemed okay after hurting me.  How I wanted to destroy them, but also realized that it wouldn't be good for me.  And how I felt tired of people asking me about my relationship.

The last album is "Broken Pandora," and it has five songs.  The overall story is about me trying to accept, feel, and heal my pain.  But people just weren't letting me do it. They wanted me to get better as quickly as possible. They didn't realize that was just making me worse, making me lose my mind, and lose my way.

I released them all for people to listen to.  Honestly, after I made those songs and listened to them, my anger decreased.  I still feel it, but it's okay.

Today, I didn't write an article, watch a movie, or work out. Is that okay, right?  Just taking a day to rest.

Oh, my friend told me that a lot of people from my old office asked her about my divorce. I was kind of shocked that they knew about it. But I don't think it's something I need to hide anymore.  It's okay for me.  I don't want to hide everything anymore.  You can see my scars now. I don't want to be someone who always looks strong.  Because faking it is so tiring. Right?

That's it for today. See you tomorrow, Love.

 

(Uwiepuspita)


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