Day 70 Till I Die




June 9th, 2025
 
Hello, my love,
 
I started my day by cooking breakfast: carrots, tomatoes, green beans, eggs, and a few shrimp, all mixed together with some sauces. It was delicious, and I had enough for both breakfast and lunch.
 
I had a bread as a mid-morning and afternoon snack; they were both very good. I also drank some lemon juice to help my digestion.
 
Remember my comment yesterday about how what's meant to be will find you? It happened again today.
 
I ordered dinner. Initially, I selected quail eggs (telur puyuh), but accidentally added anchovies (ikan teri) as well. After realizing my mistake, I removed the anchovies from the order and only kept the quail eggs. When the food arrived, it included anchovies anyway! It's like a miracle.
 
Remember the debt collector incident? I informed my sister; should anything happen to me, she'll know who to hold accountable. My ex hasn't responded to my messages—completely ignoring the situation. I also informed his family, as I learned some information that revealed his lies to me.
 
I don't understand how someone can act so thoughtlessly, ignoring the consequences of their actions. Being good or bad is a choice, isn't it? I've tried very hard not to cause problems for others. Why does he act this way?
 
This incident triggered some dark thoughts. I was reminded of a movie I watched where the main character planned to commit suicide on a specific date, attempting to achieve all his goals beforehand. He did complete everything he set out to do, and ready to suicide. But luckily he cancelled it. Should I do the same? Haha. I sent a message to my sister asking if she's proud of having a sister like me, but then I deleted it.
 
My mother sent me some food (it's still en route). She said it includes rendang and shrimp because I love shrimp so much. As I write this, I don't know why I'm crying; it feels like something hit me emotionally. 😭
 
My IELTS study book arrived today! Hopefully, it will help me study more efficiently.
 
That's all for today. See you again tomorrow, if there is one.

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