Youth
is a phase where curiosity grows faster than the ability to understand its
consequences. Friendship and romance become natural parts of that journey. But
at the same time, the maturity to view relationships through a wise lens has
not fully formed yet. This stage of searching for identity is a fragile phase
that should be protected, not exploited.
Films
like My Teacher, Narratage, Close Range Love, and Policeman
and Me try to present emotional and romantic teenage love stories. But
there is one similarity that is hard to ignore: the main female characters are
still in high school, while their partners are adult men with significant age
gaps and positions of authority—and often, they are their own teachers.
The
question then arises: can relationships like this be considered normal and
romantic, or do they fall into the territory of child grooming?
Teenagers
who are still in the phase of searching for identity can be driven by wounds
they may not even realize—lack of a father figure, the need for affection, or
the desire to be acknowledged as “more mature.” Their emotions are intense, but
not yet stable. On the other hand, their partners—teachers, police officers, or
adult men—are at a more mature stage of life, with far greater experience,
power, and emotional control.
This
is where the issue lies. Child grooming does not always appear in the form of
visible violence. It can emerge subtly: through consistent attention,
protection that feels exclusive, or narratives like “you’re different from the
others” and “you’re more mature than your age.” The imbalance is not only about
the number of years, but about who holds control in the relationship—and in
many cases, that control lies with the adult.
These
films frame the relationships through the perspective of the female character’s
feelings. The audience is invited to understand their confusion, love, and
inner conflict. But rarely do they firmly question the moral responsibility of
the adult. When an adult reciprocates the feelings of an underage teenager, the
question is no longer “do they love each other,” but “why didn’t the adult set
the boundaries that should have been there?”
A
common argument says their love is “sincere” or “not ill-intentioned.” But good
intentions do not automatically erase imbalance. True maturity is shown through
the ability to hold back and think rationally, not by following emotional
impulses that could harm the more vulnerable person.
Age
differences feel different when both parties are legally and psychologically
adults. At that stage, choosing to enter a relationship with a large age gap
can be the result of conscious consideration. Problems may still exist, but
they no longer fall into the territory of age-based exploitation.
What
needs to be highlighted is how many films actually romanticize this unstable
phase. Relationships that should be questioned are framed as “beautiful
forbidden love,” without discussing their long-term impact. This risks
normalizing the idea that adult attraction toward teenagers can be excused as
long as it is wrapped in feelings.
In
the end, rereading these films does not mean we are forbidden from enjoying
them, but rather invites us to be more aware. Not everything that feels
romantic on screen is safe to normalize in real life. Protecting teenagers does
not mean belittling their feelings, but ensuring they are not forced to grow up
too fast by adult desires.
(Aluna
uwie)
0 Comments